Like so many others I had some really exciting plans going into 2020. I had a vision of how I wanted my first year of being 30 to go. Starting that brand new chapter with positivity and a whole new, exciting adventure. They say your 30’s is so much better than your 20’s and as cliché as it sounds, I was so ready to experience that. Level up on life and embrace something different.
Alas, here I sit in lockdown again (it’s round two in the UK which lands right on my birthday) and I’m mentally preparing myself to start celebrations stuck inside. I think I came to the conclusion a while ago that I wasn’t fussed anymore, didn’t care to grieve over lost memories. Settled my mind and accepted a slow pace. It wasn’t meant to be. I have my health and that’s more important than parties or holidays.
It has all got me thinking, though, how we can put pressure on situations and raise our expectations through the roof. I learnt a long time ago, after heartbreak in relationships and friendships, that comparison really is the thief of joy. I’m more comfortable with my pace of life now than I ever have been before. My circle is small, something I love and wouldn’t change, those that are close to me all ‘do life’ differently. Because of this, I learn so much from my friends, I have rewarding and supportive conversations, we go through our own experiences and then share life lessons with one another. It’s a really special thing to have.
I have older friends, I have younger friends. I have friends who are single and those that are married. I have friends in long-term relationships who aren’t yet married. My boyfriend is younger than me, I have friends who have older partners. I have friends in my hometown and friends in London. I have friends who own homes and some are currently renting. I’m pretty sure I have friends with healthy bank accounts and others that don’t. I have friends who have children and some that don’t. My friends all have different jobs. Some like pop music and some like indie. I have female and male friends. I have friends who like cake and some that prefer cheese.
You can still have fulfilling and rewarding friendships/relationships with people that enjoy different things to you. You can set off on your own path, your own personal journey, take life at a timeline that suits you, be confident in what you like and not have to worry what anyone else thinks. In my 20’s I really couldn’t grasp any of this, which in hindsight is perfectly normal. You’re experimenting, making choices, making mistakes and that’s all ok. Although, they don’t bloody tell you that when you are 20, do they? Comparison floods in like a tsunami, hard and fast. I’ve been there. It’s dangerous and dangerously easy to merge your future with your pals.
It’s been one hell of a ride and as 2020 comes into it’s final months, I think I can speak for everyone when I say that 2021 is welcomed with open arms. Not that we asked for this, ever wanted it, I don’t doubt that we may come out of the other side a little wiser, more patient and perhaps more grateful than ever before. Your life is yours to live, so throw the rulebook out the window.
It's Emma over email but Ems face-to-face. By title, I'm a writer, photographer, creative, social media co-ordinator and more importantly rosé drinker. I'm also a daughter, sister, auntie, girlfriend and friend. I overshare and I swear. I have been dedicating my time to this space for four years. Lifestyle topics are my specialty, with a dose of daily fashion thrown in for good measure.