THE LIFESTYLE EDITION: DOES MODERN DATING ONLY STEM FROM TINDER

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The swipes, the super likes, the awkward one liners, the outright pervs, the guys with secret girlfriends, frankly the list goes on. Tinder, for me, is THE most pointless app on the planet. As a female using Tinder, I have to say, you guys have got some balls (not the kind we wanna see in our DM’s for the record). I can’t tell you how many times I’ve rolled my eyes and unmatched just within the first few exchanges of words, mainly for them being dull, rude or honestly, just a bit weird. It’s a cyber Russian roulette of dunno what card you’re gonna get. It’s just one boring, repetitive cycle that lacks the all important part of a kiss chase – the thrill!

It’s all quite a deceiving and I guess a fairly cut throat process. Is the conversation worth that all important move to WhatsApp? The idea of sussing someone out over a few neither here or there messages just isn’t the same as forming an instant face to face connection. How can you possibly tell if you have chemistry? And no, not the you look fit in your pic kind of chemistry, I’m talking real, undeniable sexual chemistry.

Without the risk of sounding completely negative about online dating, I have had a FEW positive results from a lil’ swiping session. I also want to add, before being criticised, yes I do message first. I’m not comfortable with this whole waiting for the guy theory. If I want something, I’ll damn well go and get it. So, I’ve had two what I would call, ‘proper’ dates from Tinder. I’m talking about the old-fashioned ‘drinks are on me’ kind of dates. Well, one of them being with someone I had dated previously, so possibly that doesn’t count but there was enough time apart for me to feel like it was new again. The other, a nerve-racking, first time, oh-my-god you’re a stranger meet and greet in a classic pub situation. Neither worked out for their own reasons, or even lead to a second date but needless to say, it was refreshing to attend a real life, at the time potentially successful see it through date.

‘IF THEY DON’T TEXT

WHEN DRUNK,

THEY’RE NOT

THE ONE’

Of course, a gentle reminder here that not everyone is on Tinder for the same reasons. A let’s skip into the sunset relationship isn’t the ideal outcome for everybody. A little bit of attention? Sure, it never hurt anyone. A hook up? Whatever floats your boat, we’ve all got needs. I have a friend who simply swipes right each time, just to give himself an ego boost, something he loves to boast about to anyone that wants to hear it. I have another friend who took a girl on a genuine fancy pants date, upon agreeing to go halves, only for her card to be conveniently declined at the end of the evening. Safe to say he didn’t end up seeing her again! Funny that. Whatever you’re after, however you play it, there’s never a guaranteed win win situation because it’s all based on risk. With all of that said, I’m just not sure that Tinder is my preferred or most comfortable way to start up a connection (whatever that may be at the time) with a guy.

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  • Stylesplendorbliss Tasha Juli

    You are brave! I’m off the market, but if I wasn’t, I don’t know if I’d have the nerve to go on a Tinder date!
    Tasha Juli
    stylesplendorbliss.com

  • Natasha Simran Suri

    loved this blog post! xx

  • Nicola Russell

    Too true! Unfortunately it seems it’s the only way to meet people these days xxx

  • Violette

    I loved this post! Nice photos and thanks for sharing!

    http://violettedaily.com

  • Diana Maria

    I loved this post! I’m planning to write a post about my experience with Tinder and Bumble, so far I’ve found that they’re quite different from one another. It’s really hard to meet interesting people through these apps, and at times I feel as though they’re pointless too, primarily Tinder because, well, it’s Tinder. I’m glad to hear you went on a few dates even if it didn’t work out, it’s still nice to go out and take the chance! xx

    Sending light & love your way,
    My Lovelier Days

  • I never tried Tinder, because I assumed it was just as you described it ha. I did however try various dating sites and found my husband on Plenty of Fish. I think you have to go into any of that knowing exactly what you want (like what kind of relationship and what kind of person, as well as what exactly you have to offer, so you can enjoy being yourself and not try to force anything with the wrong person) and being very picky…I mean, you’re looking for what you want in a person…if there is ever a time to be cut-throat picky, it’s then!

    ~Krisztina Clifton | http://www.krisztinaclifton.com

  • Ugh god I found Tinder to be awful. Guys just wanted a hook up!
    xo
    http://www.laurajaneatelier.com

  • I loved reading this so much. Love you writing style babe x

    Tiffany Tales | Lifestyle & Beauty

  • I’ve never had Tinder but so many of my friends have it! Loved reading this post, though!

    Have an awesome day!
    xx Kris

    https://dreamingofpink.wordpress.com

  • Mihaela

    Well, that just proves what I knew about the app already and as I said to you, I was considering giving it a go but after reading this, maybe I’ll save myself and skip on that one. If you like messaging first, maybe try Bumble because that’s one app where boys can’t message unless the girl does. I’ve only just started using it so I can’t really say much but maybe worth a try x

  • Caitlin

    Great read and cute shirt!

    How To Attend NYFW As A Blogger

  • Katie

    I had Tinder for about a day and got annoyed at the sheer number of people only looking to hook up. It was fun to “shop” for boys though haha! I’m sure it’s good for some people but it’s not what I’m looking for. Your hair looks gorgeous in these pics btw! 🙂

    http://www.beautyfromkatie.blogspot.com

  • Tinder sounds so frustrating. You really have to develop your spidey senses in those arenas! A good first start is to do as you: figure out exactly what you want to get out of the service and then communicate that and weed out those who don’t want the same – it helps if you have good intuition to detect the liars and confused. I did plenty of pre-Tinder online dating (not easy either!) before meeting my AMAZING husband.
    xo, janea
    theSTYLEtti

  • Hahaha omg this was amazing. I’ve never used Tinder because I started dating my boyfriend ages ago before it was on the market, but I’ve heard horror stories for sure. Loved reading this girl and the photos are gorgeous. You’re a catch for sure 🙂

    xx, mel
    http://melinspired.com